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| Cool Facebook bio one liner Quotes & Status |
best facebook about me
- I love my computer because all my friends live inside it.
- On a scale of 1 to 10, I am an 11.
- I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
- REHAB is for quitters!
- Where the hell am I and how did I get here?
- Always give your 100 percent… unless you’re donating blood.
- Last name “hungry”, first name “always”.
- Life is too short to update Facebook bio.
- I am going to reveal the two secrets of my success: (1) Don’t reveal everything.
Cool Facebook bio one liners
- I say no to alcohol daily, it just doesn’t listen.
- I didn’t change, I just woke up.
- Alcohol, what’s that? It’s not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.
- I’m so poor, I can’t even pay attention!
- In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency, notify…” I answered, “a doctor.”
- Keep rolling your eyes. May be one day you’ll find a brain back there.
- Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.
- I am actually not funny. I am just really mean and people think I am joking.
- Too busy to update a bio.
- I made a huge TO DO list for this weekend. Just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.
ये भी पढ़े:
cool bio for facebook
- I am going to update my bio… but you better focus on your own.
- Bio under construction… check back soon!
- Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
- Treat each day as your last; one day you will be right.
- I don’t need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.
- Sky is not the limit… the mind is.
- Of course I am not perfect; there’s a crack in my a$$
- Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.
- 3 things I want in a relationship: Eyes that wont cry, lips than wont lie, and love that wont die.
- Life is scary; at least the salary is funny.
- Remember half the people you know are below average.
best bio for facebook profile
- Our marriage is like workshops. I work and my wife shops!
- Me fail English? That’s unpossible!
- I am known at the gym as the “before picture.”
- I am not a player… I’m the game.
- Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.
- Stop being in the Rat Race and start living your life.
- Hard work never killed anyone… but why take the chance?
- Then they call me ugly and poor.
- I have not failed… my success just postponed for some time.
- Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
- Since light travels faster than sound, I appear bright until you hear me speak.
- What is a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free?
best facebook intro lines
- Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
- I hold the key to world peace; but somebody changed the lock!
- Stupidity is not a crime, so you’re free to go.
- Infuriatingly humble reader.
- I’ve never been able to figure out this damn Facebook bio thing.
- If there’s no love in the world… let’s make some.
- One person’s LOL is another’s WTF.
- At last I graduated… now thermometer is not the only thing in the world having degrees without brains.
- If I keep paying attention, I’m going to be in debt.
- Life is too short. Don’t waste it copying my Bio…!
- I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
- That cool moment when I feel proud… when a girl asks “are you on Facebook?
- People say you’ve changed, well I couldn’t stay a sperm forever! could I?
- I still don’t understand Facebook, but here I am!
- There are no winners in life… only survivors.
bio for fb timeline
- Think about doing something than doing someone!
- Professional procrastinator
- A caffeine dependent life-form.
- I don’t make mistakes, I date them.
- We are all going to hell and I am driving the bus
- Remember that guy who gave up? Neither does no one else.
- I’m not crazy my reality is just different than yours.
- Due to an intense mind fog, all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.
- Heaven won’t have me… and hell is afraid I’ll take over!
- Who said money can’t buy happiness, I think he was using money wrong.
- I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
- My job is secure. No one else wants it.
- I used to have a handle on life… but it broke.
- We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
- At the end of the day, life should ask us “do you want to save the changes?”
- I have this new theory that human adolescence doesn’t end until your early thirties.
- Sometimes you just need some space… to fart.
- God gave me a lot of hair, but not a lot of height
- Someday, there’s going to be an updated version of me.
- Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” – some dead guy
- Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.
- Don’t drink and park – accidents cause people.
- It’s not an attitude, it’s the way I am.
- CGPA available for adoption – Can’t raise it myself.
ये भी पढ़े:
best facebook intro lines
- They say money doesn’t bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it for themselves.
- I need 6 months of vacations, twice a year.
- Bio changed, just for the sake of changing it.
- Losing everything but weight.
- The future is shaped by your dreams. So stop wasting time and go to sleep!
- A nomad in search for the perfect burger.
- Do not judge me before you know me, but just to inform you, you wont like me.
- Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
- Women always call me ugly until they find out how much money I make.
- If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
- A man of mystery and power, whose power is exceeded only by his mystery
- If you’re not wasted, the day is!
- Analogue at birth, digital by design.
- Spreading smiles like they’re herpes.
- In some cultures what I do is considered normal.
- I’m real and I hope some of my followers are too.
- I only drink on two occasions. When it’s my birthday and when it’s not.
- Die with memories, not dreams!
- I will be back before you pronunce “eqwtkarepoinkdwrafkhjfdhsa”.
- Study economics when you’re unemployed, at least you’ll know why.
- I am definitely a morning person if morning starts from noon.
- People say nothing is impossible but I do nothing every day.
- You can’t have everything… where would you put it?
- There are two kinds of people in this world… and I don’t like them.
- The best of me is yet to come.
- Never forget, the world is yours. Terms and Conditions Apply.
- Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes?
- If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!
- Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
- I think, therefore I am single.
- The most you can expect from me is unconditional “like”.
- I smile because I have no idea what is going on
- If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front.
- People call me “Mike”. But, you can call me tonight.
- My Brain Is Divided Into Two Parts: Right & Left. In Right Nothing Is Left. In Left Nothing Is Right.
- I used to be indecisive but now I’m not so sure.
- I’m not smart. I just wear glasses.
- One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.
- Is everything expensive or am I just poor?
- I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
- I need patience. NOW!
- My hobbies are breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
- If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.
- When I was born I was so surprised that I didn’t talk for a year & a half.
- The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
- I’m not glad it’s “Friday”… I’m glad it’s “Today”. I Love my life 7 days a week.
- I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Whenever I find the key to success someone changes the lock.
- Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass… it’s about learning to dance in the rain!
- Time flies… after you hit the snooze button.
- Accept who you are unless you’re a serial killer.
- I’m not special, I’m just limited edition.
- I haven’t seen a sunrise in so long I joined Facebook.
- I started with nothing, and I still have most of it.
- I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.
- When nothing seems right… go left!
- My road to success always seems to be under construction.
- Born at a very young age.
- Sarcasm falls out of my mouth, just like stupidity falls from yours.
- My mother told me not to talk to strangers. I never talk to myself anymore.
- I am not on Facebook. Go do something useful.
- Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
- Life F#ck$d me — now its my turn.
- My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.
- Weird is a side effect of awesome.
- I am so open-minded, my brains will fall out some day.
- I am not a complete idiot — some parts are missing.
- Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.
- Buddy, can you paradigm?
- Can Bob the Builder fix my bad attitude?
- It’s not just me… after Monday, Tuesday even the calender says W,T,F!
- Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done.
- Contributing to Entropy since 1990.
- Don’t be sad because of people, they will all die.
- God is really creative. I mean… just look at me!
- My mind’s made up — don’t confuse me with facts.
- I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.
- Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
- I am 10, on the pH scale, maybe. Because I am basic.
- I’m Jealous of my parents… I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs!
- I’m saving my abstinence for marriage.
- Award-winning alcohol evangelist. Total introvert. Wannabe troublemaker. Bacon enthusiast.
- Acts like summer & walks like rain.
- Never laugh at your wife’s choices… you’re one of them.
- Everyone on this earth is self-centered, the difference is the radius.
- Busy making history.
- Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
- Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.
- The light at the end of the tunnel – are the front lights of a train.
- I can resist everything except temptation.
- I can’t remember who I stole my bio from or why.
- Knowledge is knowing what to say. Wisdom is knowing whether to say it o not.
- I have to be funny because being hot is not an option.
- I wanna be different just like everyone else.
- I am so good at sleeping; I can do it with my eyes closed.
- Error: Facebook bio unavailable.
- Facebook bio is loading...
- The last thing I want to do is hurt you…. but it’s still on my list.
- Without ME, it’s just AWESO.
- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
- The only thing stopping me from being pure white trash is my lack of motivation.
- I am not fat, I am just easier to see.
- Don’t follow me because I don’t even know where I’m going.
- God bless this hot mess.
- *Insert your Facebook bio here*
- I always learn from mistakes of others who take my advice.
- Life is dumb and I want to sleep.
- I’m cool but Global Warming made me HOT.
- I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
- Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.
- My blood is made of coffee.
- Do you remember my Facebook username? I locked myself out and I do not know what to do
- I swear to drunk I am not God!
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